New blog

This is the link to my new blog on WordPress.

Hope you enjoyed reading. Thank you for your support.




We’ve been waiting for months for this good news and finally it was here. Safiah’s divorce has been finalised and she can finally move on. It’s been an emotional few months for us all. First with the good news, Ahmed and his mother patched up and everything was normal between us. We spent our first weekend with them in their house last month when it was his parent’s anniversary.

Yaseen and Raeesa got  a divorce and Yaseen is now studying further and working. He hasn’t found anyone as yet but I’m sure one day he will. After all there is someone out there made specially for each of us. He is much more happier now and he has made so many new friends. Ahmed and I are enjoying his company everyday. He is such a ball of fun and excitement. Saibah has also grown very fond of Yaseen.

Tomorrow is my baby’s birthday party,  I can’t believe that a year has past. She just grew too fast, I’m lucky not to have missed all her special moments. She has definitely filled our lives with so much joy and has made us proud parent’s. I couldn’t have asked for anything to be different, yes I had a difficult life but my baby made it all worth it. She has made my life complete and has brought our families together.

Both my family and Ahmed’s family will be coming over later. We will be all staying in our house together for the first time. I know my family will manage but I’m not sure about Ahmed’s will manage. It’s their first time staying with us so I’m a bit worried. Ahmed is excited to have everyone over at the same time and he’s even more excited that his princess is turning 1.

We having a huge party for Saibah’s first birthday but not only because it’s her birthday, this was our special way of getting all our family together. There’s one relationship we have to work on and that’s between my mother-in-law!and her youngest sister. Ahmed has decided to do this task so he will talk to them in private just before the party, it’s a difficult task but we have to give it a shot.

Our families arrived and all got to their rooms and freshened up before we could start all the hard work for the braai tonight. Humeira, Faheema and I got working on salads and then drinks. The men were watching the cricket and my mum and mother-in-law were looking after the kids. Zinat and Sameera are also here from tonight, the rest of our guest only arrive tomorrow for the party.

This morning I woke up feeling sleepy, we stayed up talking till early this morning, I managed to get only few hours of sleep. After breakfast we set up the back yard for the kiddies, we had someone come in and set up for us Jungle jumping castle, slip and slide and a soft play park, we had mini cars and horses they could ride and had a few acts planned for the day. For the adults we set up inside, in the living room and dining room.

All our close family started arriving, as soon as Ahmed’s choti khala walked in he took his mother and his khala upstairs to our room and had a talk with them. He left them in the room for a little while after he spoke to them and then went to see if things changed. I am so proud of him, no matter what the results are I am happy that he decided to take a step forward and try to sort things out between his mother and aunt.

Well all the kids were enjoying the party, Saibah was sitting with my dad enjoying the show that was put on. After the kids played a little and watched one or two shows we served lunch to everyone. We had a caterer prepare for us lunch, after lunch we let the kids play again and enjoy themselves. I saw that Ahmed’s mother and aunt were talking so I figured things were sorted out between them.

We cut the cake and served tea,Saibah was so excited all the attention was on her. She didn’t manage to blow all the candles but all her cousins helped her. I was exhausted by the end of the day and just wanted my bed and pillow. It’s strange how we can go with years despising someone in our own family. We sometimes grow up with that person and shared so many wonderful memories with that person but they make one decision  you don’t like and you despise them forever.

We sometimes are so blind in our ego we don’t appreciate our family members. The fight between a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will probably last forever and we might end up seeing our daughters having the same problem when they are daughter-in-law’s and mother-in-law’s. It’s something that no one can fix. Yes there are good daughter-in-law’s and mother-in-law’s and they have the best of bonds but not all five fingers are the same. The one thing a mother-in-law or a daughter-in-law can do is overlook what the other does and find the good in each other.

This goes for family members and siblings as well, what I’ve realised is that we always looking for ways to make conversation with each other and when there isn’t a topic we take to gossiping which leads us into trouble because as much as you think the person in front of you is your family member and won’t tell the other remember they also family to that person and would go tell that person what you said the first chance they get.

Remember also that only you can safeguard your image, other’s will always find ways to make you look bad so don’t give them that chance. Whether it’s with in laws or your own family, there is always that one person that will try their best to make you look bad. One thing every person should remember that the same person you engaging gossip with is talking about you to the person they gossiping about.

Today my family and my inlaws are here spending time with us, my mother-in-law has accepted Saibah and I and we have started to share a special bond that I pray never breaks. I wish to see my Saibah grow up with all the love she deserves from both her grandparents and both sides her uncles and aunts and not forgetting cousins. It’s never nice to see someone suffer and not move on and find happiness so I wish all the happiness to both Yaseen  and Safiah’s.  May they both find their partners and all the happiness they deserve.


I hope you all enjoyed reading my blog and will enjoy reading my new blog. Will be posting the new blog in a few days. I will inform you here when I start the new blog. My new blog will be called “An Indian girls sacrifice”.


PLEASE NOTE THAT I AM WRITING A NEW STORY AND WILL POST BOTH ON WORDPRESS AND WATTPAD…. I will publish the name when I post the final post to this story.


This morning Yaseen and I went out for breakfast, then we went to meet with the florist and decided on what flowers we wanted,  she showed us a few examples of what she can do and I sent the pictures to Sakina for approval, then we met the caterers, the menu is already decided so we just had to place the order and make sure she was available for our dates. It felt weird to plan this with Yaseen since he is just went through a bad marriage.

He has been positive so far, he gave input when needed and he was very excited to help. I guess he has to move on and he needed this break to get away from things that reminded him of Raeesa. The flat was his biggest reminder, I’m glad he got rid of it. He says it’s difficult at my parent’s because he feels guilty for putting them through all the trouble and fighting with them about Raeesa.

He knows they forgive him and have moved on but he can’t forgive himself for putting our family through all that emotional stress and at the end it turned out that he was defending someone who didn’t deserve it. It frustrates me to see him like this, feeling so miserable, hopeless and like a loser when actually he is no loser. Yes he made bad choices and now he is paying for it but he was brave to get out when he could.

What annoys me is that she walks around like nothing happened with no shame or guilt. Her parent’s also have no remorse for what she did or for them keeping the truth from us. They have this don’t care attitude unless it’s harming them, her father played this very strict respectable man when infact they nothing like that, for all we care they probably part of her tricks and it’s all planned out.

We got home just after 4pm, Ahmed messaged that he wanted to skype so I messaged him when I was ready. We haven’t seen each other in two weeks, we messaged and called each other but never skyped. It was good to see him, although it was over the net. He is not sure as yet if he will come a few days earlier. He has just a week left in Malaysia so I don’t think he should rush, it would be different if it was a few days earlier.

Yaseen and I had dinner and then we sat on the edge of the pool, dipping our feet in the water, talking about Yaseen and what he is going to do now. He wants to leave his job and move to Jo’burg to study further but my parent’s are against it because he will be closer to Raeesa. I don’t mind him living with us, but I don’t want him to do it because he feels he can get closer to her and watch what she does.

At the end he will only be hurting himself and his family. I don’t think he would be stupid and get back with her but I feel he would like to know certain things like if she moved on, has she met someone else, what she is doing in life and that is only going to hurt him more. He is going to be miserable if he sees she is enjoying life while he is sulking away. The best is to ignore what is going on in her life and to make a better life for himself.

I have been keeping in contact with the lawyer’s since Ahmed has gone and we have a bit of a wait until we can hear any good news about the divorce. It’s not as easy as we thought. I am frustrated that it is not going our way and what makes it worst this morning I hear from the lawyer that Raeesa has refused to sign the papers, which means Yaseen can’t move on. Everything comes down to her now which is awful.

I haven’t told Yaseen anything because he is in such a good mood and I can’t deal with his anger alone so I don’t want to put myself into that position. At least until Ahmed is here and he can handle Yaseen and his anger. We lost track of time and surprisingly Saibah slept all this time. I looked at the clock, it was 11:30pm. I locked up and then we went to bed. I jumped into bed and Saibah woke up.

I woke up this morning in a chirpy mood, we were going on a shopping spree today to help Rizwana and Farzeen get their outfits. Yaseen was tagging along, he would of been bored at home anyways. Ahmed is returning later today so I’m overly excited. Rizwana and Farzeen came to the house just after 10am, we had a quick snack and then left to do our shopping. I left Saibah at home since I am in Lenz and with her shopping would just take longer.

We went window shopping first and enquired about the outfits and then decided which ones we really liked. After we got both their outfits we went back to the house and had lunch. Imraan was fetching them after work so we watched tv and the girls played with Saibah before he came to get them. The driver fetched Ahmed from the airport, I am so glad he is back. Finally everything can get sorted out.

The most important is Safiah’s and Yaseen’s problem’s. They in problem’s that are not allowing them to be at peace while both their partners are at peace. A few minutes after the girls left Ahmed walked in. He was happy to be home and we were happy to have him home. We sat for a while and then had supper. Ahmed went upstairs to get some sleep. I sat to read my book while Yaseen played games.

Saibah was asleep so I enjoyed my quiet time. I went upstairs to sleep and Ahmed just woke up. We spoke for a little while catching up on stories. He decided that he would sort out both Safiah’s and Yaseen’s problem’s soon. He also needs to sort things out between his mother and himself. She has been calling me while he was away saying that she wants to apologise for all the wrong she has done to me and all the pain she caused.

This morning I told Ahmed about all the calls his mother has made to me since he left and that she has apologised and we have sorted things between us, now he has to call her and sort things out between them. He has no excuse not to forgive his mother because the reason he was arguing with her was Saibah and I and now that she has accepted us and apologised he has no fight. He promised to call her after breakfast and he did so.

Yaseen and I spent the day shopping for the wedding while Ahmed went to see the lawyer’s for Yaseen’s case. Finally we had some good news, Ahmed took the papers personally to Raeesa to have them signed. I don’t know how but he got them signed, soon the papers will be filed and they will be divorced and my brother can move on. Safiah’s has been doing well and has been discharged so Ahmed has arranged for her and her parent’s to come back to Jo’burg.

Soon he will have her divorce papers filed and he knows it will be a quick case since Reeza is guilty of alot of things and Ahmed said he was going to speak to Reeza and tell him if he signed the papers we wouldn’t lay charges for all the other assaults and all the other things he did wrong. We also found out about his dealings with drug dealers but we didn’t let him know about it.



As soon as Saibah opened her eyes I called Nomsa to take her. I needed some sleep and if I didn’t get it I would be very moody. I set my alarm for 11am, closed the door and pulled the upstairs phone off the hook, it’s Saturday which means my mother and Faheema call in the morning. Just seconds before my alarm can ring I wake up, I take a quick shower and go down for breakfast, I make myself crumpets with strawberries and nutella.

Nomsa gets Saibah dressed while I got everything into the car. Nomsa was coming with me so she could take care of Saibah. When I got to Sakina’s house Saibah was asleep so I didn’t stress too much about her. I showed them what I came up with and people we could use for the wedding, they changed a few things and agreed to use the people I found to help on the day. It was a quick meeting which gave me time to visit Aunty Rubina.

It was strange going back to my old place even Nomsa said it felt nice to visit the complex. There’s no one staying in the apartment I was staying in. We surprised them so they were really happy to see us. We sat and spoke about our days together, the outings we had, the fun times and we even made fun of some of the things we did. Imraan was our main target though, we teased him about the things he did to meet up with Sakina.

I got home just before maghrib, I fed Saibah and then left her to play while I made something for me to eat. After maghrib I sat and watched a movie, Saibah was asleep so it was a good time to watch a movie. I haven’t watched a complete movie in a long time. Well I didn’t end up watching the full movie, I fell asleep and all the blame goes to my sleep deprivation. I woke up two hours later when Saibah wailed.

Today I’m having Uncle Abdullah and his family over for lunch, I got out of bed early, did all my chores before I started cooking. I’m making leg roast with veggies, I’m making sojee for the sweet dish and we having ice cream for dessert. They got here around 11am, the girls were all over Saibah, they didn’t leave her for a minute. After lunch we sat and discussed what they were planning for the wedding and walima.

Farzeen and Rizwana want me to go with them to look for outfits so we make a date for next weekend. We don’t have alot of time, this wedding is in a months time. As soon as they left I called Ahmed, it’s two days and he hasn’t called. He knows I worry if he doesn’t call or at least message. He was really busy, we didn’t speak long, he told me he would call once his meeting was over.

My cousin Aneesa called, they were going out for dinner, she asked me to join them. Aneesa and Faheem fetched us, I was glad I didn’t have to drive alone, I hate it especially when I got Saibah with, I just don’t feel safe. We went to spur for dinner, it was nice, although noisy which always is at any restaurant you go that is full of indians. After dinner we took the kids to play some games at the entertainment centre.

We got home quite late, I went straight upstairs, made Saibah sleep and then I watched a little tv before I fell asleep. I heard my phone ringing, I looked at the time and it’s 9am, I looked at my phone and see it’s Yaseen. He wants to come to Jo’burg, I’m not sure if it’s such a good idea because Raeesa is this side, I don’t want him to confront her or complicate things by doing something silly.

I also don’t want him to feel like I’m pushing him away when he needs me so I agreed to him coming but on the terms that he goes where I go and he doesn’t do anything silly that would cause trouble. He said he would be here by the evening, I got ready, had breakfast and then started preparing for supper. I didn’t bother about lunch since I was alone. I made his favourite pasta dish and for desserts I made pineapple dessert.

I called Safiah’s parent’s to see how she was doing. She has healed well but emotionally she is not doing well. Reeza obviously got out on bail which made her feel worst but she has hope as the police officer has assured her that they got enough evidence to get him some years for what he has done. Personally I don’t think the police officer should of said anything because we all know South african law.

The doctors are discharging her in a few days, they will stay at the villa until she has healed completely. I am glad that she is doing much better, I hope that she recovers both emotionally and physically, it’s going to be a tough journey, only she knows what she is going through, the pain she is feeling. I just wish she keeps a positive attitude throughout her healing process. Zaheer said he will have his friends visit her often.

Maybe they will be an inspiration to her, the one is a psychologist and the other is an Aalima, so they will help her both spiritually and emotionally. She needs a lot of attention, love and care, her parent’s are going to be her biggest support. They will have to be patient and forget about themselves this time and only concentrate on her. I hope they understand what she is going through.

I went to the mall to do some grocerry shopping before Yaseen got here, I want to stay away from shopping centres with Yaseen around, it’s going to be difficult since I am shopping for the wedding. I will have to work around it and be careful, maybe I can take him along to babysit Saibah. Yaseen arrived just before maghrib, he looked really tired, I asked him what happened, apparently he hasn’t been sleeping.

He feels he needs to get away from his daily routine, he only managed to clean out his flat this week. He couriered all Raeesa’s things to her already and the rest that he bought after like furniture and stuff were all sold off. He didn’t use the money as yet so she can’t blame him for not goving her money from it although she didn’t buy any of it with her money. He called her to ask what she wanted to do with the furniture and she said he should get rid of it.

We had dinner and then Shiraaz and Sabiha came over with the kids so we watched a movie while Nomsa and Thandi looked after the kids. Sabiha was telling me that she also hasn’t watched a movie since Lutfiya was born. I guess until you a mother you don’t realise what mother’s go through. While we were watching a movie we heard someone screaming outside, Shiraaz and Yaseen went to see what was happening.

A few houses away from us there was a fight between neighbours. Apparently one neighbour put his garbage bags on the other neighbours side and the dogs ripped it apart, neither of them wanted to pick it up so instead resorted to screaming and swearing each other in the street. It’s the first time Yaseen and I experienced something like this, we’ve always grown up with family as neighbours.

Our other neighbours we’ve never had problems with and if there was a problem they would always come and discuss it or we would go to them and discuss it in a polite manner. This was literally aunties telling each other how they would hit the other, pull out each others hair or throw garbage all over their lawn. It was awful to see and disgusting to see women carry on in a rowdy manner.