It’s been a hectic few days, everyone is upset and emotional. Yaseen has been looking for a house to move into, he only found a flat and decided to take it. Raeesa is throwing tantrums because she won’t be living with my parents. She doesn’t even realise the tension she has caused our family in this past week. Humeira is caught in the middle because Raeesa keeps sending her all nasty messages.

Gosh… this woman is a real devil, we can’t even say anything to Yaseen because he feels we being to harsh. Since all the drama started I’ve kept myself away from the wedding dealings. I’ve basically sat at home kept the visitors company and made sure there’s food on the table for everyone. Ahmed and Shuaib has been helping Yaseen alot because the rest of us said that Raeesa should come plan her own walima.

I know it’s my brother’s wedding but I don’t even feel like attending. I’m praying something happens so I don’t have to attend it. Faheema is so furious,  she is not wven speaking to Yaseen, she wants him to call off the wedding. My parents have been miserable the whole week,  Humeira has cried a million times because of the nasty messages.

It’s not even Humeira’s fault, she is just doing her duty as a daughter-in-law,  she even helped Yaseen with the things for the walima even after all the nasty, horrible thing she was told. One minute we all excited about this wedding and the next we all feel it shouldn’t take place. We not going to be here and if she lives with my parents she will just make their lives miserable.

Yaseen asked Faheema and I if we would be at his flat when his furniture arrived. Faheema was not up to it but I dragged her and Zinat with me. I needed to fish from Zinat if she knew about Sameer fooling around. We got there just in time, the guys offloaded the furniture and then we left. We went to have breakfast at the mall, while sitting there Faheema and I got to work.

We made a story about someone we both know but Zinat doesn’t know, it was a story about Zinat and Sameer but we changed the characters. We just added a horrible end to the story, at first Zinat just sat there and listened but by the time we ended the story with how the wife was now a maid while the mistress ruled the house, Zinat was ready to tell us everything.

She was in tears and didn’t know what to do, she confronted Sameer, he didn’t deny anything. He told her everything about this lady he has been chatting to and what they have been chatting about. I was angry at Sameer and I felt so bad for Zinat, no one else knows anything as yet but in a small town like ours it won’t take time before everyone knows.

Faheema suggested that Zinat should give Sameer an ultimatum, either he leaves her or that lady. I don’t know if that’s the right way, there’s no one you can ask but Allah. I advised her just that and told her to take it from there. If she is open to polygamy then maybe he can marry this other woman as his second wife. I know I wouldn’t stay in such a relationship and from what I know about Zinat she wouldn’t either.

We didn’t stay long at the mall because we left Humeira and my mum with the kids including Saibah. When we got home, Yaseen was on the phone with Raeesa. He was telling her everything that been going on the last few days and that his family are now going to come to his walima as guests. My dad said he will make an announcement to our family and friends at the thursday night zikr about the walima.

I feel so bad for Yaseen but he is also not making it easy on any of us. I spoke to Faheema and we decided we will help where we feel we won’t be judged or accused of anything and we will have everything approved by Yaseen even if it means before or during the walima. Faheema and I tell Yaseen we will help him out with conditions though. I think he was just glad he had extra hands.

This evening my dad had a talk with all of us about what is going to happen from the wedding until the day Yaseen and Raeesa go on honeymoon. So after the wedding we have them booked at a lodge in town, they will stay there until they leave for their honeymoon. When they return they can move into their flat, my mum arranged for an aunty to have lunch and supper for them for the two days before they leave.

After our meeting my parents went to their room, they both looked upset. I know they are not happy and it breaks my heart to see them like this. I just want my parents and my brother to be happy and if the solution is them living separately then so be it. I know it’s difficult for all of them and Humeira will probably be hit the worst because from the looks of it she is already being targeted. Ziyaad will have to support her in this fight.

Our family has always been close, we did everything together, Shuaib has also started spending more time with us and now we might loose it all, I guess that’s life for you. Anyways today I decided to bake for the weekend, so Humeira and I got busy baking while Faheema and my mum cooked. From today everyone in the family will be coming for supper to our house.

So much for the wedding spirit, everyone beside our house seems excited about this wedding. Honestly I feel that Raeesa and her parents owe us an apology and until they don’t realise they caused a problem we all going to sit with a problem. I hope she doesn’t get married into our family thinking we all going to jump to her tunes, that’s not happening ever.

Ahmed decided to take Sameer to play golf and talk to him about his affair if that’s what you can call it. I just hope they come through to some solution and Sameer sees what he is doing is wrong. He has a beautiful wife, who does so much for him and he can’t appreciate that. He runs off to the first woman who shows some interest in him, his wife also shows interest in him but I guess he is looking for something else.

When Ahmed got back,  he said he spoke to Sameer,  he made him realise that this woman he is chatting to is married,  she is cheating on her husband and he is cheating on his wife. Also if she can cheat on her husband what makes him think she won’t cheat on him. Sameer called her to the club and told her that they can not be friends anymore and he doesn’t want to have contact with her.

I just hope this last and he doesn’t go back to his old habits. It’s going to be a working process for them, they will have to work on their marriage and Sameer will have to gain Zinat’s trust again. Without trust in a marriage it is very difficult to move forward,  she will have to learn to trust him and not doubt him.




Surprisingly Saibah slept longer last night, she only woke up twice for her feed. I guess she was tired from fighting her sleep the whole day with all the attention she was getting. I am just glad to have gotten the extra sleep. For breakfast my mum made my favourite pancakes with strawberries and cream… I love getting spoilt by my mum,  I think even when I’m older I will still enjoy it.

After breakfast,  we just lazed around waiting for Faheema and her family to come. Ahmed went out with Sameer to play golf, at least he didn’t sit at home and get bored. Faheema and them arrived just after 11am, the kids all went straight outside to play and we sat and had a good chat about what we’ve all been up to. After lunch we left Ahmed and Shuaib to look after the kids, I took Saibah with me because it would of been too much for the men.

We went to sort out the colour scheme and dishes with the caterers and the food with the cook. Then we had to go and see Sameera, the lady that does the front table with snacks and drinks. Tonight we having a family meeting, my dad called the meeting to sort out last minute orders and checks for the wedding. All my cousins and uncles from town will be here.

So tea-time I spoke to everyone about my idea to go away together for a small holiday. Ahmed said last night if everyone else agrees he doesn’t mind going. After I told them my idea they all said it was a great idea although no one gave me an answer. I will give it until tomorrow and then see what they say. My Dad’s brother from next door and his family came over for supper.

After Esha everyone came over,  my dad discussed everything about the wedding and walima. Who will be going to jhb, who will be staying behind and everyone where given their chores to do. My mums family unfortunately live too far so they will attend the wedding and walima and then go back. I know it all just started but after the day I had today, I can’t wait for this wedding to get over and done with.

When we got to bed Ahmed told me something Sameer told him which really disturbed me. I never thought he would think of such a thing, I don’t know if I should tell Zinat or not. Why… why am I always the one in the middle. I tossed and turned most of the night, I kept thinking how Zinat would react if she found out. On one hand I’m trying to deal with Safiah and her problems and on the other I am sitting with a new problem.

I think he was taking it too far when he actually showed Ahmed who the lady is who he has been chatting to. She knows he’s married and still she chats to him, how desperate can you be. I’m not blaming her solely, Sameer is also at fault, he shouldn’t of made friends with this lady. I don’t want to create any problems now when it’s Yaseens wedding but I don’t know how long I can keep quiet.

I get through the day just fine. I told Ahmed not to let Sameer know that he told me, I’m goping that I will manage tonight because Zinat and Sameer are coming over. For some reason Yaseen has been avoiding me today, I don’t know what his up too. I don’t know if it’s just me or is he doing the same with everyone else. I left it until Faheema came to me and told me that Yaseen is upset with me.

Usually when we upset we let each other know, speak about it and solve the problem. So what is different this time, it bugged me alot after Faheema told me. At first I decided to ignore him and also play the game of I’m not talking to you but then it felt childish so I went to speak to him. It was such a trivial matter which could of been sorted out if only he came to speak to me.

Also it was not only my decision but a mutual decision of all us ladies in the house. Apparently Raeesa chose the colour scheme for the walima, I don’t even know why she chose the colours because it’s our function given from the boy’s side, not like we telling her what to wear and what colour to use for the wedding. We just felt that her colours didn’t match and we liked a different colour.

Yaseen heard my mum and Humeira speak about how they love the new colour scheme and that they were so relieved I suggested other colours. So naturally he told Raeesa and she made an issue out of it. I knew she would be difficult, I didn’t even know she chose the colours. Why was she given the option to pick in the first place? Humeira felt bad that Yaseen was not talking to me.

She blames herself for speaking her mind to my mum. I called Yaseen and told him that it is our function, Raeesa has no say in it. Since when has a girl told her inlaws how she wants a function they hosting to be like. I also showed him that I could get upset, maybe it wasn’t the right thing to do but he needed to know that she doesn’t have a say in everything.

After a huge talk and a couple hours later he called Raeesa and told her that I am right and it is our side function, we not telling her what to do in her functions. She was upset and all moody but that didn’t bother me. My mum looked at us all at supper and asked if we finally understand why she feels that she and Raeesa won’t be able to live under one roof.

No one said anything because they know that after today, there is going to be alot of trouble coming to this house. I don’t know but I have this strange feeling that I can’t shake off. Like Raeesa is going to seek revenge over this… I just hope all goes well. I actually feel like I’m dealing with a gangster, I know it sounds ridiculous but she gives such threats you would think she is one. Most of her decisions come from the influence of her father.

I wonder if she ever takes any decision on her own, imagine what their marriage will be if her father controls everything. So my dad gets home from the shop today, he’s home later then he usually is. Raeesa’s father called my dad and asked him why we not doing things according to what Raeesa want. I flipped when I heard that, I literally am done with this nonsense and just want to go home.

It furiates me that they think they can rule us and that she has a say in everything. I told my mum that I was done… I didn’t want to have anything to do with this wedding anymore. I will be there but I will not do all the hard work and take orders from Raeesa and her family. If this is how things are now, I can only imagine how things are going to change in this house.

This morning at breakfast my dad said he wants Yaseen and Raeesa to live separately, he said that they too old to deal with her. Yaseen was upset but he understands and sees that it’s affecting our family. I hope he is ready to live a life with a dictative wife, he is definitely not going to be spending as much time with us as he does now. I can’t believe this woman is already causing tension in our lives.



Today is a big day, Choti khala is moving into her new house. They will be seeing the house for the first time so it’s extra exciting. The painters only finished off yesterday so they couldn’t go see the place. I took Thandi with to help us clean the house before their belongings could arrive. I’m glad we didn’t have to unpack anything just supervise, I hate moving, it’s just so tiring.

Most of our day went sorting where things should go, I didn’t stay until they finished because I had to pack and get things ready for our trip to my parents. We had to cart alot of things especially with Saibah, all her things took up one big bag. Lucky we not taking Nomsa and Thandi because we wouldn’t of fitted, Ahmed said the driver should bring them the week before the wedding.

After I got most of our things packed, I called Ahmed to see how far they were. He said they were going to be a while so I left Saibah with Nomsa and took food for them. We finished up and then went home, Ahmed’s cousins were very excited to be in their new house. I think they were more excited with the yard space and pool. It was so overwhelming just watching them light up when they entered the house.

His Khala and Kaloo were literally in tears when we were standing outside. It was just something else, that feeling, seeing them happy and excited and knowing that we brought them this happiness made me feel proud of Ahmed and his decision. When we got home Saibah was asleep, we tip toed our way around the room and got ready for bed. When we got into bed Ahmed huged me and said he is so proud of me.

This morning was such a rush, we had so much to do before we left. Ahmed had some last minute work so I had to do most of the sorting out. Luckily Nomsa and Thandi were around… I don’t know what I would do without them. Finally everything is packed into the car and we are ready to leave. This is our first long drive with Saibah, just as we were leaving Lenz she fell asleep.

After one and half hours we finally reach my parents. I can’t believe Saibah slept through our whole trip here, probably the drive. I’m so excited to finally be here, it’s just a different feeling being at your parents. We here for less then an hour and already Saibah is being spoilt. Tomorrow Saibah will be exactly 2 months old, I can’t believe my baby is growing so fast.

Zinat obviously couldn’t stop herself and came to see us the minute she heard we were in town. She also joined everyone in spoiling Saibah, she brought her a whole lot of goodies. This will be our first stay over at my mum’s after Ziyaads wedding, so Humeira will have us all to deal with, I hope she manages. Tomorrow Faheema and her family will be here so you can imagine what the house will be like.

I left Ahmed to look after Saibah and went with my mum to see all the things they organised with the caterer and changed a few things. I don’t know if the colour scheme was chosen by my mum or Humeira for the walima but I didn’t like the colours. I told them not to finalise the colours when Faheema is around we will change it. I also changed the cutlery and crockery. I like square plates, it looks more elegant at a function.

My mum knew that Faheema and I would change most of the things they chose, apprently she even told Humeira that. I just hope Humeira doesn’t get offended if we change anything she decided on. When I got back, I see Ahmed sitting outside and Saibah is not with him. I know it’s not her nap time so I panicked thinking he forgot he was looking after her.

Zinat… yes only Zinat can do this, she decided to take Saibah with her and went to her mother’s house. I left her, let her look after Saibah for a while, I wanted to see how fast she came back with Saibah. I know she won’t be able to handle it when Saibah cries. There was so much to do still, I thought my mum would be prepared like usually is, i guess because she spent all the time by me.

Well atleast we got this week to sort out thing, I’m definetely not going to attempt to do it all on my own. My dad fetched my Dadi on his way from the shop, she was spending the day with her friends at the old age home. I couldn’t wait to see her, last I saw my Dadi was when Saibah was born. I like to hear her stories about the family, her old days and friends… I’m sure we will get to hear alot today after her visit.

Yaseen and Ziyaad came home and looked for Saibah, they made me call Zinat and have her bring Saibah home. I don’t know what I am going to do when we get home, she is going to get use to being in the hands with everyone carrying her. I usually make her lay on her stomach or back or sit in her seat and play, I don’t want her picking up bad habits, even sleeping I rock her in her seat.

My mum was not joking, this evening was crazy with all the family and friends coming by to help with the wedding. We already started putting ribbons on the card that will go on the sookh mookh, tomorrow we will start with the parcel, I want to do that when there’s no one around. We having lunch and supper by us from next week so we also have to clean all the meat and chickens.

Humeira has baked already, but I’m not sure it’s going to last until next week with the amount of visitors we getting. We decided we will see by Thursday and see from there what to do. For the walima we got my cousin’s baking and making desserts and then there’s a lady who does front table with snacks and drinks. I’m going to see her tomorrow to see what we can do for the walima.

Gosh… I can already see this next two weeks being very adventurous and tiring. I might need a holiday after this just to recover. Actually that’s not a bad idea… maybe we can all go together while Yaseen and Raeesa go on honeymoon. We haven’t been on a holiday together in a long time and my parents had their last holiday two years ago…something to think about.

Maybe tomorrow when Faheema and them are around I can suggest it and I’ll speak to Ahmed tonight about it. Sometimes I surprise myself with the genius ideas I come up with. I just hope everyone thinks my idea is genius and agrees… otherwise down the dustbin goes my ideas and my excitement.



I woke up to noises made with dishes, at first I thought that someone was in the house. I turned to wake Ahmed, so he could check but he wasn’t in bed. I went downstairs only to find Ahmed attempting to make breakfast. I didn’t want to spoil his afforts so I messaged Nomsa to come inside and help him. He knows how to make simple things like salads and how to clean veggies and meat but to prepare a meal, he hasn’t done himself alone.

Nomsa came inside and helped him make pancakes and helped him set the table. He cut the fruits, whipped the cream and made a chocolate sauce. After all the racket stopped, I went downstairs. “Surprise! Happy anniversary love,” Ahmed shouted out. I pretended like I didn’t know what he was up to. We had a lovely breakfast, although it came with all the mess but it was tasty.

After breakfast, I prepared for lunch and then Ahmed went to mosque for jummah. We had lunch and then relaxed upstairs playing with Saibah. Later on Saibah will be staying with Sabiha and Shiraaz for a couple hours. I didn’t want to but Ahmed said we wouldn’t be long. I have no idea where we are going or what we are doing. I was just told to dress up because we going out.

At 5pm Sabiha came to fetch Saibah, I felt so bad leaving her. I told Ahmed ahead of time that I didn’t want to do anything hectic, maybe just supper and a movie or something simple. So we went for a movie and then he booked us a table at one of his friend’s restaurant. He had a special private section just for us, it was lit up with candles and rose petals all over the floor.

We got home just after 9pm, we were then a couple of hours. Saibah was asleep, Sabiha said she didn’t trouble at all, I guess she will be okay with anyone she knows and as long as she has her feeds, gets changed and sleeps. When we got home, I put Saibah down, then Ahmed and I sat in the upstairs tv room. We sat and spoke for hours, just spending quality time with each other.

Before we knew it was 1 in the morning, we had to be awake for fajr and we were going on our trip with Shiraaz and Sabiha. Ahmed and I never spoke about anyone besides ourselves. From the time we met and became friends, our fun and exciting times and even the times we were put through tests. All the family inteference from his family and how we almost never ended up together and then finally having each other, to being where we are today, 1 year later.

It was a rollercoaster experience but we got through it and we now have a little family of our own. We are happy and we have learned how to deal with every situation. We have come out stronger, we no longer let minor or major problems caused by others come between us. It’s great and we finally enjoying life and we happy about that because it allows us to enjoy being parents to a beautiful little girl Saibah.

When Ahmed got back from fajr namaaz we had breakfast, then Thandi and Ahmed got the car packed and Nomsa helped me get Saibah ready. We were a bit delayed so Shiraaz and Sabiha came over. After a two and half hour drive we finally arrived at the farm. It was the most peaceful and beautiful place, I’m glad we decided to join them. We unpacked the cars and then went to freshen up in our rooms.

Sabiha and I got straight to work on lunch so we didn’t have to worry last minute what we were going to eat. We spent the day exploring the farm, in the pool and relaxing in front of the tv. At night we sat around the fire place talking about many things. Nomsa and Thandi were taking good care of the kids so we didn’t have to worry about them. Shiraaz and Ahmed mostly discussed business which annoyed Sabiha and I.

After supper the men decided to go back into the pool. I didn’t want to go in, incase Saibah woke up, I couldn’t leave her with Nomsa the whole time. Sabiha and I sat inside talking about Yaseen’s wedding that is taking place in two weeks time. When we get back a day or two after we will be leaving to my parents and will stay with them until Yaseens wedding.

We have alot going on when we go back, Monday Ahmed and I will be taking choti khala to her new house. She already packed her things, Ahmed is having movers do the rest. I’m just glad his khala changed her mind, I don’t know why my mother-in-law got involved. Anyways this morning we went for a nice hike, I didn’t take Saibah because I didn’t know how far it was.

We got back an hour later, had breakfast and then went to see the little petting farm. It was so nice to interact with all the animals especially the lion cubs. The rest of the day we spent relaxing by the poolside and just after 4pm we went on a game drive. I felt so relaxed this weekend, I really needed this getaway. Tomorrow we go back home, although I enjoyed this weekend and I’m always screaming to get out of the house, I miss home after a few days.

Saibah refused to sleep for most of the night, she barely got 2 hours of sleep. I left Ahmed in the room and took her to the lounge. She didn’t make any noise… just didn’t want to sleep. I was so tired in the morning, I could barely keep my eyes open. I don’t know how I made breakfast, got dressed or helped pack all our things. Lucky I was not driving back, I would have probably fell asleep.

When we got home, I made Ahmed look after Saibah while I went to sleep. I needed at least a couple hours of sleep to function, I was a walking zombie. I slept for about 4 hours, the best sleep I could have. I called my mum today, they all excited and getting ready for the wedding. She says the weekend they had so much visitors, all the town people coming to offer their help.

It’s so nice to have a wedding in a small town, everyone is invited and the atmosphere and love is just something else. I can’t wait to be with all my family and friends, wedding vibes are such a great feeling. My mum is still stressing over Raeesa, I think she should stop stressing and walk into this with an open mind, let things happen as they should.

My mum suffers from anxiety so she always stresses when she doesn’t know what life has in stores for her. She likes to know things beforehand so she can prepare herself for the worst. It comforts her if she knows what is happening. I understand where she is coming from and how she is feeling, all we can do is comfort her and be by her side but most of her comfort is going to be in Humeira because they together all the time.



My father-in-law was here early in the morning to fetch Kausar and Sumaya. Kausar was scared after last nights incident and so she called her parents and told them she didn’t want to stay by us. Ahmed really scared her,  he almost lifted his hand on her. I would of probably also been scared after his reaction. I felt so bad for them and for my father-in-law, he kept apologising.

I am just hoping my mother-in-law doesn’t create a fuss over all that happened. It will just create a sour scene between Ahmed and his sisters. After they left I woke Ahmed up and told him that his father was here to fetch his sisters. His father looked upset, I don’t know if it’s because of Ahmed or because of Kausar. He didn’t say much to me besides apologise.

Ahmed thinks I’m over-reacting, he is sure it’s nothing. How can he just ignore all that happened, his mother… she is going to be furious. I called later in the day to explain to my mother-in-law and to apologise for Ahmed’s behaviour. She just said they would come by in the evening, this got me more worried. I told Ahmed not to be late and to keep his calm when they come.

As time got closer, I become more nervous and prayed that things would not get worst. After supper Ahmed went to Shiraaz and Sabiha’s house,  he said he had something to discuss with them and I should stay at home incase his family came. Well they did, my mother-in-law came in and asked for Ahmed. Ahmed finally came and we could sort things out.

Before we could say anything, his mother made us sit down and then she made Kausar apologise to us for what she did. Then she apologised to Ahmed, she told him that his reaction was normal,  that she would of probably reacted the same way. She didn’t give us time to say anything, before we could she said they must leave,  they have an early morning.

I couldn’t believe my ears or eyes, it felt like I was in dreamland. My mother-in-law apologising, probably because it’s her son. Well atleast it ended well and everyone is  now happy. I’m glad it didn’t end badly and they have apologised to each other and forgiven each other. Maybe she has realised that we are not affected when she does something bad.

Today I’ve been busy trying to get things sorted out for our trip. Nomsa has been helping bake some goodies for breakfast and tea time, I marinated the meat already, now all that was left was to pack our bags and pack the food baskets. I will get to the bags later, I need to make sure that Choti khala and I have our conversation today and my inlaws are not around.

I thought it would be better if I had our driver fetch choti khala and then we could meet up at Sabiha’s house, that way it’s just us and we won’t be interrupted. When choti khala got here, we went to Sabiha’s house, I already informed Sabiha so she made sure we were left alone to discuss thing. So I was right Ahmeds mother told choti khala not to take our offer.

Apparently she found out when she went to their house and saw they were packing their things. She asked them where they were off to and one of the kids blurted out ‘to our new house that Ahmed bhai got for us.’ We didn’t succeed in keeping things a secret. Anyways I told choti khala that we had bought the house already, all that is left is for them to see the house and move in.

After a little persuading, she said she will speak to everyone at home and let us know. What are we going to do with this house if they don’t take it. I don’t know why my mother-in-law is getting involved, it has nothing to do with her. Ahmed said he would have a talk with his mother next week. Let’s hope it solves things and not make things worst.

When I got home my inlaws were there waiting for me. Lucky I didn’t have the meeting with Choti khala at home. They came to see if Saibah was doing okay, I couldn’t entertain them much because we had to be at the doctors for Saibah. Her doctor just wants to make sure she is not badly injured. She has cried everytime we touched her head so I’m a bit worried.

Ahmed got home and then told his parents that we had to go for Saibah’s doctors appointment but they could stay at home and relax until we came back. My mother-in-law first agreed then she said that they will rather finish visiting the family. Ahmed told the that we won’t be around from Friday, they staying until next week and he doesn’t want them spoiling our anniversary.

Everything went well at the doctor, the scan came out clear. We just have to be patient and wait until the swelling goes down. My poor angel, I can’t see her in this pain, even when she sleeps and moves her head, she wakes up crying. Ahmed is still so upset, he keeps telling me not to let his family near Saibah. It’s not like it was purposely done, it was an accident but he still feels we should be careful with them.

When we got home, Nomsa said that Ahmed’s parents came back after we left, they came inside for a few minutes and then left. I found that really strange, I told him maybe they needed to use the bathroom. I didn’t ask Nomsa what they did because Ahmed would get suspicious. Sabiha and Shiraaz came over for supper, we ordered take-outs and then watched a movie.

I checked with Shiraaz and Sabiha if we needed to take anything else or make anything else to take with. I showed Sabiha all the things I was taking with, she thinks I’m crazy. She didn’t even bake, she got meat that she marinated and then bought snacks like crisp and chocolates. I also had marinated meats, breakfast cereals and tea and coffee things.

I like to be prepared, I never go on a holiday without taking everything I need or might need. My family always teases me because I take my own dish cloths, dishwashing liquid, everything from home. I’m not as bad as some people, I know of people who take their own bedding, I must admit I hate using the hotel towels so I take my own. I’m  a very fussy person I know but Ahmed is worst then me.

I packed our bags before we went to bed, I left Ahmed to check on Saibah while I was busy. He sat in the room because he’s still not comfortable being alone for too long with her. Tomorrow is our anniversary, I’m super excited, I never thought we would ever make a year. I never thought I would have a baby in my first year of marriage, Ahmed and I only discussed once and at that time I didn’t think we were ready.



Back to routine, long weekend is over, everyone has gone back to their homes. Ahmed has to go back to work, and I take over my housewife duties after a whole month. I woke up early today, before fajr, Saibah woke up and refused to go back to sleep. So I came downstairs with her, I sat a little while playing with Saibah and then Ahmed woke up, he went to mosque and I read my fajr.

When Ahmed came back I made breakfast for us. At the table Ahmed said that his choti khala called him last night and said that we must not buy the house for her. We already bought the house, it is just for us to take them to see the house. I asked him why and all he said was ‘there is only one reason for them to take this decison’. Which is obviously my mother-in-law, it seems like she has my father-in-law under her ruling.

He just dances to her tunes and so do her daughters. I decided to go and visit his khala and find out what is the whole story and also try to convince them to take the house. It is such a nice house and just what they need, they must stop thinking about others and listening to other people. I prepared lunch and then got ready, I called his khala to see if she would be home.

When I got there, my inlaws were there, they were sitting outside so I couldn’t just drive past. I left Saibah at home so atleast Ahmed wouldn’t be upset with me if his parents saw her. I greeted them and then sat for a few minutes, choti khala knew why I was there but she didn’t say anything and I didn’t want to discuss things infront of my inlaws. I just made an excuse that I was passing by and saw their car so i stopped.

I excused myself saying that I left Saibah at home so I should leave. They didn’t bother to ask about Saibah, they showed false excitement when we told them we were expecting. If they were really that excited, they would of came to see their only grandchild. When Ahmed got back from work, he asked me about his choti khala and what she had to say, I told him what happened.

The first thing he asked if they saw Saibah, lucky I didn’t take her with otherwise I was in trouble. I would of loved to take her with and say to them this is your grand daughter but I don’t want to cause problems in my marriage. They will have to put their pride aside or Ahmed will have to agree to them seeing Saibah out of our house. I don’t know for how long he thinks he can control the situation but if they don’t come see Saibah at home then they bound to see her elsewhere.

Ahmed decided about our weekend away, so we finally going away. He already told Shiraaz so I just have to discuss with Sabiha what we going to take with. I’m so excited, we are going to take Nomsa and Thandi with us, they can look after the kids when we busy. We still have a few days until we go on our trip but I’m excited from now. I already told Nomsa to take out our suitcase and gave them instructions what needs to be done for the trip.

I am glad today Ahmed forgot about what happened yesterday and he is not sad and upset. He has been playing with Saibah the whole afternoon and even changed her and made her sleep. He is such a good father, he takes so much care of Saibah. My only worry is that he is over protective, he gets offensive if I mention his parents seeing Saibah. He has this thing in his mind that everyone must give Saibah attention and if you don’t, he won’t give you time.

I tried so many times trying to explain to him, things don’t work like that. You have to put your pride and ego aside and still be nice and do for people even if they not nice to you and even if they don’t do for you. He knows what I try to tell him, it’s not like he doesn’t but he chooses not to take heed. I gave up on explaining him all the time because I end up wasting my time.

Something exciting besides our weekend trip is happening this week, Friday is our anniversary. Ahmed has taken the day off and planned something for us, well we will be at home until after jummah and then he has his surprise. I tried fishing it out but he won’t tell me and I hate surprises, I like to always know what’s going to happen, I guess I will have to just wait until Friday.

After supper we planned on watching a movie that Ahmed brought last week, we had so much visitors last weekend and my mum was around as well so we didn’t get to watch it. We had supper and locked up the house, then we went upstairs to our room. Saibah was asleep and we could at least get to watch a movie between her nap and feeding times. We just started the movie and we here someone hooting.

Ahmed tells me to ignore it but I feel so bad, so I went downstairs to see who it was. Nomsa had already gotten the door, it was Ahmed’s parents. I greeted them and made them sit while I went to bring Saibah and Ahmed down. I’m sure he has already checked out of the window to see who it was and that made him not come down immediately.

When I went upstairs, Saibah had awakened and Ahmed was trying to make her sleep again. I grabbed her from him and told him to go downstairs to see his parent’s while I changed Saibah, he didn’t want to at first but eventually he went. They were happy to see him and he also didn’t be nasty to them. I guess when you see your family infront of you, you forget and forgive everything and everyone.

I came downstairs with Saibah, my sister-in-laws ran to see her. There it was, that’s all you need is for them to show that they care. My mother-in-law held back for a while but my father-in-law was excited. They did apologise for not coming earlier, they did give excuses so it was easier to forgive them. They sat for a while and were going to Ahmed’s khala but we asked them to stay with us.

My mother-in-law allowed my sister-in-laws to stay but she said that she and my father-in-law had to go stay by her sister because they expecting them. I don’t understand… actually I don’t want to understand why would she stay at her sister when she has her sons house. They know exactly how to make people talk bad about them. They play with Saibah for a little while until she starts crying like she’s never before.

I don’t know what it was, I took her upstairs and made her quiet. Ahmed came to check if she was okay, he called our pediatrician to see if something was wrong. He panics very quickly for no reason, he even had the doctor come over. Lucky his mother had already left otherwise we wouldn’t of heard the end of it. The doctor came and checked on Saibah, she said she was fine but had slight swelling on her head.

She wanted to know if we had knocked her head or she knocked something into her head, nothing like that happened with any of us and we even asked Nomsa and Thandi. After the doctor left Kausar told me that she accidently dropped the ornament on Saibah’s head. I told her it was okay and she shouldn’t tell her brother but it was too late, he heard us talking already. He was very upset but I pulled him away before he could do anything.

Ahmed is very hot headed and can’t see straight when he’s angry. He would of probably hit Kausar if I didn’t stop him. It was an accident, I agree she was careless but she never took care of a child before and I left them alone with her thinking they big enough to be with her alone. I never thought that they would be more interested in their phones and playing with our ornaments. He warned me not to leave Saibah alone with them.



Ahmed called me to the room, he looked upset. When I walked into the room I heard him saying “she always knows how to mess up my life”. I knew it had to be something serious, why was he so upset and who was he talking about. He turned around and hugged me, I was confused, a few minutes ago he was angry and now he is hugging me. His mother told him she called me to ask if I was stopping him from coming.

He was happy with the way I dealt with the situation and that I didn’t even complain to him about her. I explained to him that it doesn’t bother me anymore, I know how she is and I don’t want it to come between us and I really don’t want to live in an unhappy environment. When we found out we were expecting Saibah, Ahmed and I decided not to let anyone come between us, he promised that he would not let his family harm our relationship.

My mother-in-law took a break while I was pregnant but it seems like she has started again trying her best. We almost married for a year and we have a child together and still she doesn’t give up. The best thing for us to do is let her do as she pleases and we should just ignore her efforts. That way she will hopefully stop and we are gauranteed not to be harmed, it sometimes gets though but we have to deal with it until it stops.

We didn’t let anyone in my family know what was going on, Ahmed said he didn’t want to spoil their weekend. After Raeesa and her parents left my parents were still discussing the move. My mum is still on the idea of having both my brothers move out. She only explained why when Raeesa and them left. She thinks that Raeesa and her won’t get along and before things turn sour they must move.

Yaseen felt a bit offended but we explained to him why my mum feels this way. It’s been a weekend of rollercoasters but finally everything is working out…well almost everything. Somethings I guess will never change or more like some people. As my Dadi always says ‘all five fingers are not the same.’ You can’t expect everyone to be the same, the world would be boring if we were.

Tomorrow everyone is leaving and Saibah and I can finally get out of the house so we decided to go out for lunch. We decided to go to Ocean basket, we haven’t had fish in a while and we getting tired of meat and chicken, I’m glad my mum was around, I got to eat all the lekker indian veggies made her way. Some of the veggies Ahmed hasn’t even heard of but he enjoyed them.

Saibah is already a month and 11 days old, she is growing so well. I’m so excited to take her out of the house, for her to get some sunshine, all she has seen was inside our house. Raeesa called Yaseen this evening and things got a bit out of control. Apparently her mother planted the idea that my mum doesn’t like Raeesa that’s why she doesn’t want to live together, she said that my mum had no problem living with Humeira.

Yaseen tried to explain to Raeesa that mum likes her and that it’s not what she thinks. I think we should just be honest and tell her, my mum actually feels that Raeesa and her won’t manage in one house. Humeira is easy going, she and my mum work out their weekly chores and they do things the same way. Raeesa has her own ways and my mum is also stubborn, we know she likes things her way.

Things got so bad, I thought our weekend would definetely end bad. My mum is very straight forward so she speaks her mind and sometimes people don’t like it. I know sometimes we feel she should could just remain quiet instead of letting things out but I have to say I like her being straight forward because people don’t try to walk all over her. For things to sort out, my mum had to do something.

So she decided to call Raeesa and her parents and spoke to them all about why she wants her sons to move out. She explained that she thought it wasn’t fair to only ask Yaseen so she asked both of them. Humeira and Ziyaad have just settled living with my parents so they don’t want to move. Yaseen and Raeesa can move from the start so they don’t wait for a problem. They didn’t say much but said they would let us know.

I don’t know what that really meant but I am glad our weekend was not spoilt. Yaseen was a bit down but got out of it once he spent sometime with his nephews and nieces. Alls well that ends well. After everyone went to bed, Ahmed and I sat in bed and spoke about not getting involved in my mums decision because it will create problems for us siblings and I don’t want that, my family is my strenght.

After breakfast we all got ready and left to the mall. It was so good to see something different then our house walls. I was getting annoyed just sitting at home. It is so nice to finally see different faces, different things, people would think I was getting out of jail. Saibah was so content, I guess it was the fresh air and change of scenery. I’m a person who can’t sit at home for too long, I like to go out and have fun and not just be stuck at home.

After everyone left Ahmed suggested we visit his Choti khala, to our surprise Ahmed’s parents were there. Actually I wasn’t surprised, we decided not to go in and just drove by. Ahmed said he doesn’t want to take Saibah to see them but they must come see her, I don’t argue with him because no matter what I say he is not going to listen to me. Eventually we ended up by Shiraaz and Sabiha.

Lutfiya was sick in the week, she was admitted to hospital, I couldn’t go see her but I did send my mum and Ahmed to see them. She is doing much better and is back home, lucky it was nothing serious. I called Nomsa and told her if Ahmed’s family come over, she must call us. I was hoping that they make a turn by us, Ahmed would be very upset if they didn’t. They probably decided while they around for the engagement to visit everyone.

I’m not giving it much thought but I can see Ahmed is irritated. He is not even playing with Ebrahim like he usually does, Ebrahim even asks why he doesn’t want to play. Shiraaz is planning a trip away for the weekend, they going to his uncle’s farm and he wants us to join them. Ahmed is not really interested in anything so I tell him we will let him know. 

It would be great to get out for a weekend, we will have to see when Ahmed is in his right frame of mind to decide what he wants to do. We go back home after 2 hours, it’s already past 8pm and his parents haven’t visited us yet. I just hope they come otherwise there’s going to be war, I can’t handle anymore stress. If it’s not my inlaws and their nonsense then it’s someone in my family or my friends that’s got a problem.

I made tea for us, we watched tv, it was past 11pm and they still didn’t come. When it got to 9pm, I knew they wouldn’t be coming but Ahmed was hopeful. He kept saying ‘I’m sure they got held up somewhere’. I didn’t say anything because he would of just got more upset. I took Saibah upstairs and then I got into bed, I left him to wait for them.

I fell asleep waiting for Ahmed to come to bed, I woke up in the middle of the night and saw Ahmed sitting on the couch in our room, he said that they didn’t bother to come. I don’t want us to argue so I just say nothing when he says something about his family. At the end our relationship will be affected and they will be care free and happy.